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Jan. 12th, 2005 01:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
alexmegamiOkay, I seriously just had the definitive most random-ass dream EVER. I'll probably LJ-cut later parts of it because they're really... well, you'll see.
So from the beginning of my remembering:
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
sae had given me a call. "I'm bored," she tells me, and I inquire why this is the case. "I'm housebound," she says. Fearing she's broken her leg or something, I ask what's wrong.
"I was sleepwalking and started throwing rocks at some house. They don't believe I was sleepwalking, though." She is completely nonchalant about this, so of course I fly across the country to visit her.
They really don't believe that she didn't just start randomly throwing rocks at houses.
So we're outside (I assume her curfew must have been up), and it is summer and beautiful and wonderful, indicating that maybe we're not in her hometown after all. We are sitting in the middle of the road (which is remarkably unbusy), hanging out and chatting, when this short black guy (maybe 16, 17) starts walking towards us. Wearing the most pimperiffic clothing I've ever seen, the centerpiece of which is a huge-ass white fur jacket.
He, apparently, is Coolio. That is all he tells me before wandering off. Sae confirms this. "Yup, that's Coolio." She is laughing and I have no idea why, other than the sheer ridiculousness of Coolio.
Cut to back inside her house, where I am confronted with a family of about 8-10 people ranging in age from under 1 year to about 17 (not including Sae) plus two parents. If you can envision SimonL's household when his mother is babysitting (or Brampton-Pete's house), imagine that. If you can't, any house with a lot of children will do.
There is a lot of drama about spilling things and presents (it's Christmas, now), but most of it is minor.
Next thing I know, I'm on The Price is Right with the mother, father, SimonL, Jason, and Pete, as well as one of the adopted daughters from the family (who is 14 and cute and Asian). There's a random guy sitting next to her, and two obviously underage kids next to him. They get kicked out by staff. (Sae is nowhere to be seen.)
The father and mother are across the aisle from SimonL, Jay, Pete and I, and the girl is a row in front of us. Next to the parents is this RANDOM-ASS CRAZY LADY. She is asking the mother things like, "Don't you think the porn is doing terrible things to our country?" in the intermissions. The mother is smiling and trying to be polite. Also, imagine this lady is saying "the porn" in the same way a fundie might say "the devil". In fact, in exactly that way.
So the 14-year-old gets called up to be a contestant with Bob, and we're all cheering (ignore the fact that you have to be 22 to compete on TPIR). Even the guy that was next to her is cheering.
The crazy woman is like, "Well, isn't that nice?"
And the mother mentions that the girl is developmentally challenged in some way (I don't know what).
And the woman FREAKS OUT. "She's not one of them pornography devil babies! She's a right pretty girl, she don't have them flippy pornography bandit hands!"
I was like O______O;;; and then I started laughing, both in and out of the dream, because this woman was just... just... what?!
And that, my friends, is why I should not have dreams.
So from the beginning of my remembering:
sae had given me a call. "I'm bored," she tells me, and I inquire why this is the case. "I'm housebound," she says. Fearing she's broken her leg or something, I ask what's wrong."I was sleepwalking and started throwing rocks at some house. They don't believe I was sleepwalking, though." She is completely nonchalant about this, so of course I fly across the country to visit her.
They really don't believe that she didn't just start randomly throwing rocks at houses.
So we're outside (I assume her curfew must have been up), and it is summer and beautiful and wonderful, indicating that maybe we're not in her hometown after all. We are sitting in the middle of the road (which is remarkably unbusy), hanging out and chatting, when this short black guy (maybe 16, 17) starts walking towards us. Wearing the most pimperiffic clothing I've ever seen, the centerpiece of which is a huge-ass white fur jacket.
He, apparently, is Coolio. That is all he tells me before wandering off. Sae confirms this. "Yup, that's Coolio." She is laughing and I have no idea why, other than the sheer ridiculousness of Coolio.
Cut to back inside her house, where I am confronted with a family of about 8-10 people ranging in age from under 1 year to about 17 (not including Sae) plus two parents. If you can envision SimonL's household when his mother is babysitting (or Brampton-Pete's house), imagine that. If you can't, any house with a lot of children will do.
There is a lot of drama about spilling things and presents (it's Christmas, now), but most of it is minor.
Next thing I know, I'm on The Price is Right with the mother, father, SimonL, Jason, and Pete, as well as one of the adopted daughters from the family (who is 14 and cute and Asian). There's a random guy sitting next to her, and two obviously underage kids next to him. They get kicked out by staff. (Sae is nowhere to be seen.)
The father and mother are across the aisle from SimonL, Jay, Pete and I, and the girl is a row in front of us. Next to the parents is this RANDOM-ASS CRAZY LADY. She is asking the mother things like, "Don't you think the porn is doing terrible things to our country?" in the intermissions. The mother is smiling and trying to be polite. Also, imagine this lady is saying "the porn" in the same way a fundie might say "the devil". In fact, in exactly that way.
So the 14-year-old gets called up to be a contestant with Bob, and we're all cheering (ignore the fact that you have to be 22 to compete on TPIR). Even the guy that was next to her is cheering.
The crazy woman is like, "Well, isn't that nice?"
And the mother mentions that the girl is developmentally challenged in some way (I don't know what).
And the woman FREAKS OUT. "She's not one of them pornography devil babies! She's a right pretty girl, she don't have them flippy pornography bandit hands!"
I was like O______O;;; and then I started laughing, both in and out of the dream, because this woman was just... just... what?!
And that, my friends, is why I should not have dreams.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-01-12 06:59 pm (UTC)*laughing to death*
Sorry. You're right. Your dreams truly are the STRANGEST EVER.
And clearly, I like, eloped with Coolio instead of going on the Price is Right.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-12 07:47 pm (UTC)You are my hero.
Actually, my favorite was "Hey, let's just go to the West Coast for the hell of it! :D"
no subject
Date: 2005-01-12 08:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-13 08:18 am (UTC)She's a fair bit further south, is my excuse ;)
I am officially repeating this line whenever an opening presents itself:
Date: 2005-01-12 11:13 pm (UTC)Re: I am officially repeating this line whenever an opening presents itself:
Date: 2005-01-13 08:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-13 05:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-13 08:18 am (UTC)