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alexmegamiLike the Nordic Saga in six parts, except less funny...
5:38 AM. Have been at this for more than 6 hours. My last companion of the night has left me to my own personal hell. I don't blame her, though 2:30 AM is nothing.
For some reason, the second login screen won't load properly. I think my mind is cracking under the stress.
Am running out of Crasins. May delve back into the Lindt box for sustenance.
Getting sleepy...
5:47 AM: Still no signs of relief. Am no closer to my goal than when I started. Wait, the login screen opened properly. Maybe I can get one gun registered.
5:48 AM: Forgot to mention: Spider is the only thing keeping me sane any more. May resort to tooth and nail before this is through.
5:50 AM: Am convinced I will die here, friendless and alone. Someone save me, take me away from this awful place!
I'm going to have a sleep-hangover tomorrow.
In other news, have beaten my tenth game of Spider. Nationstates has nothing new.
5:51 AM: Am into the opening login page. May actually get some gun information registered before the night is through. Am having deja vu: always a bad sign.
5:52 AM: VICTORY FOR THE WHITE MAN! One gun registered; five to go. Start praying... now.
5:58 AM: Eleven games of Spider beaten. Running only on adrenaline now.
6:00 AM: Have clicked "back" to make the second gun register at least five times now. Am considering selling myself to Satan to make this work.
6:02 AM: Game of Spider lost. Is this what my life has been reduced to, Spider games?
6:11 AM: Now trying to send the information for #2 has been reduced to this, conversation style:
Me: SEND!
It: Cannot find page to display!
Me: SEND!!
It: Cannot find page to display!
Me: SEND FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING GOOD!
It: Fuck off, bitch.
6:12 AM: Oh wonderous miracles! Two of them registered! I will survive yet.
6:16 AM: A third!
...I'm being set up for a terrible joke, I know it.
6:19 AM: The fourth! I am in light of my goal. I am buoyed by elation. Fingers crossed, heart pounding, the works.
6:21 AM: Five down, one to go. I wish I believed in God so I could pray to Him not to have this fuck up.
Something strange is in the air. If it tries to fuck up this registration, we will kill it, won't we, precious?
6:25 AM: The last one is in. Feel as though I am in the last leg of a marathon; exhilarated, but so much can still go wrong.
6:28 AM: SHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT.
6:31 AM: THANK FUCKING GOD.
The damn screen of death came up, and when I tried to back up, it gave me the Retry button. Now, normally, this would mean DEATH on this computer, but thankfully, all the information was still there.
Now to tentatively try again...
6:35 AM: My nerves are shot to hell, and it still isn't sending.
6:36 AM: DO NOT LISTEN TO THE SHOVING ROBOT. SHOVING IS THE ANSWER. WE ARE HERrerre to prorrooteect youuurrrrrrrrrrrrrr *whirr* *bzzzew* *click*
6:39 AM: ...fear? It says that the application "has already been submitted", which I can only assume means that ONE of those times I clicked and recieved the "error page of doom" that it went through.
I fear for my very life.
6:45 AM: My Life, Through My Eyes, As I See It Now: Blurry. And rather like space. Full of fire and ice and devoid of meaning.
Help me, my life depends on a printout that the website won't give me, the secure knowledge that this registration has gone through that the website won't give me, and this website to give me peace that the website won't give me.
I don't usually share this sort of information, but I'm two seconds from a very messy and probably sopping wet emotional breakdown.
6:50 AM: Have gotten back into the listing of firearms page and printed that out. Will try sending again.
There is no mind behind the eyes any more.
7:01 AM: Now it's telling me there are no firearms listed.
7:02 AM: Have won another Spider game. Feel proud in the way a chicken that knows it will be killed tomorrow feels when it eats the final corn piece... it is an empty soulless victory, only fitting for empty, soulless me.
7:06 AM: SALVATION RINGS! I have just remembered that I need to catch up on BmB and Venus Envy! SAAAAAALVAAAAAAAAATION!
But no, the registration still is not working.
7:12 AM: I have finally gotten BACK through to the "this application has already been sent" page and printed that. If anyone has a problem with this - fuck them.
TALLY:
Number of hours spent trying to get into this: 7
Number of hours spent entering all the information: 1
Hours of time I SHOULD have been spending with Simon of those 8: 3
Circles of Hell I have been through: 7
Circle of Hell I currently reside in: 7th
Number of times I have tried to send this to get a definitive final answer: too fucking many
Number of Spider games played: countless thousands
Hours I will now sleep: ...0
What's the point in going to bed anymore? I can die without the sleep.
5:38 AM. Have been at this for more than 6 hours. My last companion of the night has left me to my own personal hell. I don't blame her, though 2:30 AM is nothing.
For some reason, the second login screen won't load properly. I think my mind is cracking under the stress.
Am running out of Crasins. May delve back into the Lindt box for sustenance.
Getting sleepy...
5:47 AM: Still no signs of relief. Am no closer to my goal than when I started. Wait, the login screen opened properly. Maybe I can get one gun registered.
5:48 AM: Forgot to mention: Spider is the only thing keeping me sane any more. May resort to tooth and nail before this is through.
5:50 AM: Am convinced I will die here, friendless and alone. Someone save me, take me away from this awful place!
I'm going to have a sleep-hangover tomorrow.
In other news, have beaten my tenth game of Spider. Nationstates has nothing new.
5:51 AM: Am into the opening login page. May actually get some gun information registered before the night is through. Am having deja vu: always a bad sign.
5:52 AM: VICTORY FOR THE WHITE MAN! One gun registered; five to go. Start praying... now.
5:58 AM: Eleven games of Spider beaten. Running only on adrenaline now.
6:00 AM: Have clicked "back" to make the second gun register at least five times now. Am considering selling myself to Satan to make this work.
6:02 AM: Game of Spider lost. Is this what my life has been reduced to, Spider games?
6:11 AM: Now trying to send the information for #2 has been reduced to this, conversation style:
Me: SEND!
It: Cannot find page to display!
Me: SEND!!
It: Cannot find page to display!
Me: SEND FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING GOOD!
It: Fuck off, bitch.
6:12 AM: Oh wonderous miracles! Two of them registered! I will survive yet.
6:16 AM: A third!
...I'm being set up for a terrible joke, I know it.
6:19 AM: The fourth! I am in light of my goal. I am buoyed by elation. Fingers crossed, heart pounding, the works.
6:21 AM: Five down, one to go. I wish I believed in God so I could pray to Him not to have this fuck up.
Something strange is in the air. If it tries to fuck up this registration, we will kill it, won't we, precious?
6:25 AM: The last one is in. Feel as though I am in the last leg of a marathon; exhilarated, but so much can still go wrong.
6:28 AM: SHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT.
6:31 AM: THANK FUCKING GOD.
The damn screen of death came up, and when I tried to back up, it gave me the Retry button. Now, normally, this would mean DEATH on this computer, but thankfully, all the information was still there.
Now to tentatively try again...
6:35 AM: My nerves are shot to hell, and it still isn't sending.
6:36 AM: DO NOT LISTEN TO THE SHOVING ROBOT. SHOVING IS THE ANSWER. WE ARE HERrerre to prorrooteect youuurrrrrrrrrrrrrr *whirr* *bzzzew* *click*
6:39 AM: ...fear? It says that the application "has already been submitted", which I can only assume means that ONE of those times I clicked and recieved the "error page of doom" that it went through.
I fear for my very life.
6:45 AM: My Life, Through My Eyes, As I See It Now: Blurry. And rather like space. Full of fire and ice and devoid of meaning.
Help me, my life depends on a printout that the website won't give me, the secure knowledge that this registration has gone through that the website won't give me, and this website to give me peace that the website won't give me.
I don't usually share this sort of information, but I'm two seconds from a very messy and probably sopping wet emotional breakdown.
6:50 AM: Have gotten back into the listing of firearms page and printed that out. Will try sending again.
There is no mind behind the eyes any more.
7:01 AM: Now it's telling me there are no firearms listed.
7:02 AM: Have won another Spider game. Feel proud in the way a chicken that knows it will be killed tomorrow feels when it eats the final corn piece... it is an empty soulless victory, only fitting for empty, soulless me.
7:06 AM: SALVATION RINGS! I have just remembered that I need to catch up on BmB and Venus Envy! SAAAAAALVAAAAAAAAATION!
But no, the registration still is not working.
7:12 AM: I have finally gotten BACK through to the "this application has already been sent" page and printed that. If anyone has a problem with this - fuck them.
TALLY:
Number of hours spent trying to get into this: 7
Number of hours spent entering all the information: 1
Hours of time I SHOULD have been spending with Simon of those 8: 3
Circles of Hell I have been through: 7
Circle of Hell I currently reside in: 7th
Number of times I have tried to send this to get a definitive final answer: too fucking many
Number of Spider games played: countless thousands
Hours I will now sleep: ...0
What's the point in going to bed anymore? I can die without the sleep.
