OH GOD MEAGAN

YOU TOO CAN HAVE A HENRY PUMPKIN

asjdakjfhsdfk.

I can has many Henry tricks?

*is twelve* Hee hee hee.


...why are vampires so damn pretty?

Fandom as Exes

Treating book authors as though they were exes, who is...:

The one who seduced you and fucked you over and broke your heart in a million pieces and laughed about it: I don't know that there is any author that's been so cruel to me. George R. R. Martin gets off on withholding from me though.

The old flame you don't see very often anymore but whom you still really enjoy getting together with for a few drinks and maybe a pleasant nostalgic romp in the sheets: CLAMP, heh. Um, author... Kit Pearson or Katherine Paterson, probably.

The mysterious dark gothy one whom you used to sit up with talking until 3 a.m. at weird coffeehouses and with whom you were quite smitten until you realized he really was fucking crazy: Ray Bradbury, but I'm still smitten. Same goes for Charles de Lint (when he writes horror).

The mysterious dark gothy one whom you used to sit up with talking until 3 a.m. at weird coffeehouses and with whom you were quite smitten until you realized he really was fucking crazy... and then a few years ago he cleaned himself up and got a job in the food service industry and now he won't shut up about how much hates George Bush as if he's the first one who ever hated George Bush and he's still fucking crazy and immature and annoying but boy is he still hot: Anne Rice? *lol*

The one you spent a whole weekend in bed with and who drank up all your liquor, and whom you'd still really like to fuck again although you're relieved he doesn't actually live in town: Paul Pope. Ow. Also Emma Donoghue.

The steady: Hooray for polyamory! Tanya, Pterry, and Neil. *fans self*

The alluring stranger whom you've flirted with at parties but have never gotten really serious with: Issac Asimov. His short stories leave me weak in the knees, but everything else? I'm just not sure it's relationship material.

The one you hang out with and have vague fantasies about maybe having a thing with but ultimately you're just good buddies 'cause the friendship is there but the chemistry ain't: There was the great one-nighter with Guy Gavriel Kay, but he's so hit and miss that I think I should stick to the memories.

The one your friends keep introducing you to and who seems like a hell of a cool guy except it's never really gone anywhere: Douglas Coupland. Why haven't I read anything by him yet?? WHY?

The one who's slept with all your friends, and you keep looking at him and thinking, "him? how the hell did he land all these cool babes?" Kurt Vonnegut, kids. Seriously, I get that you love him, but I don't fucking understand WHY. Same goes for Mr. Gibson.

The one your friend has fallen for like a ton of bricks and whom she keeps babbling to you about on the phone for hours, and you'd be happy for her except you just know it's going to end badly: William Gibson. You're all going to wake up with your brains leaking out your ears. Him, or R. A. Salvatore.